CHISTE #1: An older man goes in for his yearly physical, with his wife tagging along.
When the doctor enters the examination room he says, "I will need a urine sample, a stool sample, and a sperm sample."
The old man, being hard of hearing, turns to his! wife and asks, "What did he say?"
The wife yells back to him, "GIVE HIM YOUR UNDERWEAR!"
CHISTE #2 (y en cierta parte, muy realista jejeje): A large corporation recently hired several cannibals.
"You are all part of our team now", said the HR rep during the welcoming briefing. "You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don't eat any of our employees". The cannibals promised they would not.
Four weeks later their boss remarked, "You're all working very hard and I'm satisfied with your work. However, one of our secretaries has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?" The cannibals all shook their heads "No".
After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others, "Which one of you idiots ate the secretary?" A hand rose hesitantly. "You fool!" the leader continued. "For four weeks we've been eating managers and no one noticed anything. But NOOOooo, you had to go and eat someone who actually does something.
CHISTE #3: "Breakfast at the White House"
The attractive waitress asks Cheney what he would like, and he replies,"I'd like a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit."
"And what can I get for you, Mr. President?" George W. replies with his trademark wink and slight grin, "How about a quickie this morning?"
"Why, Mr. President!" the waitress exclaims "How rude! You're starting to act like Mr. Clinton, and you've only been in your second term of office for a year! ''
As the waitress storms away, Cheney leans over to Bush and whispers..."It's pronounced 'quiche'."